10 posts tagged “dudes in speedos”

Sometimes (read: always) I wish I lived in an area where there was more happening instead of basically nothing--meaning, I wish I lived in a city, so I could just hop a train somewhere cool. I mean, yeah, being in Jersey, I can basically do that anyway, but that's not my point. My point is, I want what I don't have, not what I could have if I tried a little harder. Anyway, things:

Over at the Editing Room, they've got the abridged script for the Dark Knight, and it's not bad, but it's got a bristling comments section going for it. I was lured in and contributed some of my office-addled insights, like this gem:

Lastly, as this thread seems to be devolving, there is a difference between rating a movie, and rating the experience of watching it. I the TDK is pretty darn entertaining as a movie, in the theater, that I sat there and watched (twice). As soon as I left the theater the first time, I was able to point out flaws, but when I went back to watch, I could care less about the flaws, because I was having a good time, because that’s what the movie is: a good time. It gets a lot of gas for dealing with psychological issues, and for being almost unrelentingly somber, and I think that’s why it gets a pass with so many people: it’s okay that it’s imperfect because it seems to mean well. It treats the comic with respect and blahblah…

So, yeah. In Rod’s review/script for GVS’s Psycho remake, he points out that there is a lot that isn’t entirely awesome about the movie because it wasn’t so awesome in the original. But Psycho transcend’s the criticism beause it upped the ante at the time and people have been ripping it off ever since. That is the case here, sort of, at least according to the media, so that’s TDK’s burden and is why it’s probably so easy to get excited about, and so easy to hate as well. RANT!

OMG I'm so fucking insightful!                                 

The Hollywood Reporter also has a story about the Dark Knight (because it's fun to talk about), and along with it, they've got a sampling of the hefty bundles of millions it's gotten for everyone's favorite charity case, Warner Brothers:

$871.5 million
Worldwide boxoffice cume

$489.4 million
Domestic boxoffice cume
(second highest ever)

$158.4 million
Opening weekend (best ever)

$49.8 million
Worldwide Imax gross (highest ever)

34%
Percentage of Imax viewers seeing the film for at least the second time

18
Days to reach the $400 million domestic benchmark (fastest ever)

Sources: Nielsen EDI, Imax Corp. and THR research; figures as of Sunday night

I'm so happy for them! Next and last, Aaron Sorkin, the mushroom-enthusiast and West Wing show creator, is putting his considerable, mind-bending talents toward the feat of writing a Facebook movie. Sigh. Look, what I'm posting are reasons to drink this weekend. Says THR:

Facebook was founded by Mark Zuckerberg while studying at Harvard along with pals Dustin Moskovitz and Chris Hughes. At first, membership was restricted to Harvard students, then expanded to all Ivy League schools before going on to open up for all universities and high schools in Canada and the U.S. The site now has more than 100 million users worldwide.

Despite offers in the billions of dollars, Zuckerberg has steadfastly remained independent.

Endeavor-repped Sorkin last wrote "Charlie Wilson's War," while Rudin has "Revolutionary Road," starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet, and the film adaptation of the Broadway play "Doubt" coming out this fall.

"I feel about this introduction the way I felt about 'Sophie's Choice': It could have been funnier," Sorkin finished.

Whatever, Aaron. Lastly lastly, your boy Mike Phelps is gonna host SNL. Later daaaaays!!!

Well, it's been a long, speedo-y, body-imaging destroying week, but it, like the circle of existence itself, comes to an end, as Michael Phelps has finally won the Olympics, forever. They will be missed.

[Times, obs; picture Deadspin]

 

 

 

Michael Phelps won his sixth medal this year (it's gold) and that means our feelings of having to write about the olympics will soon be coming to an end. Says the Times, in their steadfast coverage which I've managed to not directly quote all week:

Before racing against Phelps on Friday, Lochte started with a come-from-behind upset of his countryman Aaron Peirsol in the 200-meter backstroke, winning his first individual Olympic gold medal in world-record time.

The race ended at 10:21 a.m. local time. Twenty-seven minutes later he had his showdown against Phelps in the 200 I.M., and a less-than-fresh Lochte could not match Phelps.

But then, neither could anyone else. Pulling away from the field in the breaststroke — his weakest leg — Phelps won his sixth gold medal in Beijing (and 12th over all) and set his sixth world record, one of 21 set by swimmers here. He was timed in 1:54.23, finishing more than a body length ahead of the silver medalist, Laszlo Cseh of Hungary. Lochte nearly caught Cseh at the end, but settled for third.

So there's that (oh, and the article itself goes on for, like, two hours just making the one point). In gymnastics (female) America took gold and also silver--in girls' swimming, Germany took the top and Australia took silver.

 

 

Saturday Phelps has another final, his Speedo endorsement qualifying final, as it would decide if he's going to tie that record everyone's been talking about, or if he's suddenly going to jump into the pool and forget how to swim and be awesome, forcing Lochte to jump in to save him, bringing him onto the platform, holding a hyperventilating Phelps until the fear of near-death leaves his shivering frame, his olympic dreams dashed by random awesomenesia.

 

 

Country	Gold	Silver	Bronze	Total
USA	14	12	18	44
CHN	24	9	5	38
AUS	5	7	8	20
RUS	3	8	8	19
KOR	6	8	3	17

America has the most medals again, but this thing clearly goes back and forth, so...

[Times/NBC]

 

 

Last night I, again, actually watched some of the proceedings on a real-life television. It was around ten, so what I saw was swimming, missing gymnastics, about which I had to read. With the Olympics being everyday and always, I'm probably getting burnt out a bit, but that's probably also due to the fact that the human manifestation of the games, Michael Phelps, didn't compete for a medal yesterday, so I was reduced to watching athletes who don't have ethereal auraus and a halo, which might as well just be baseball, right? I want him to reach these goals of his just to see what happens. My fear is he'll do a bunch of interviews and turn out ot be a douchebag, but only time will tell. Via NBC:

Country	Gold	Silver	Bronze	Total
CHN	21	7	5	33
USA	10	9	14	33
AUS	5	4	7	16
KOR	6	7	2	15
FRA	2	7	5	14

God hates America, so China is winning now, even though we're tied (they have more golds, like that matters, seriously...). It's funny how the country holding the games and the country most up its own ass are doing the best. Whatever. I get paid today--that's what I'm into.

 

Picture via NYT.

Oh, and the Chinese are dominating gymnastics, won a gold in archery and even shooting and Judo (so don't fight the Chinese, either hand-to-hand, or with projectile weapons [swim from them]). Anyway, NBC has been scoring pretty good with these Olympics, so good for them I guess. I was starting to think that people stopped giving a shit about this stuff back in the 90s, but clearly not.

 

Randomly, link to Jezebel's grab of a feature on US swimmer Ryan Lochte.

 

 

Olympic news in general is always Michael Phelps-centric. This is why Colander Today is encouraged to be that way as well--because it's American. But we'll get to him in a minute. First, here's the Olympics for Wednesday, so I don't have to think about it at work because I'm obsesed at this point. Did you know the current standings were powered by Exxon Mobile? Me neither, but they are:

Country	Gold	Silver	Bronze	Total
USA	10	8	11	29
CHN	17	4	5	26
KOR	5	6	1	12
AUS	4	2	6	12
RUS	2	7	3	12

Ooh. The US is in the lead. I wonder what the significance of having more medals than other countries could be? No idea, but hopefully it makes us look good in a public relations kind of way.

 

 

Oh, and the story within the story, Michael Phelps, surges along as he wins his fourth fifth of the games, and his billionth overall (not really) making him the most successful olympian ever, or something to that effect. The Times, in a centuries-long peice on the star, interviews some people about his awesome-prowess.

 Everybody has their theory about what makes Michael Phelps peerless. Simon Burnett, a freestyler from Great Britain, shared his the other day with Eddie Reese, the United States men’s Olympic coach.

“He’s not from another planet,” Burnett told Reese. “He’s from the future.”

Recounting the story Wednesday, Reese laughed and said, “That’s probably the best explanation I’ve heard.”

 

We also lost in diving, which I guess isn't our strong suit--by we, I mean the actual people doing the work, not me, wishing my parents forced me to play sports when I was younger, that way I'd be awesome right now (but I'd probably think people'd laugh at me if I swam or dove, and then I'd quit and still suck, so...) Today is soccer, fencing, some badminton--tonight God Tivos more Michael Phelps, along with the rest of the universe.

 

 

Oh, and Getty Images are the dj clue of borrowing photos ("clue, clue, clue...")--it's just so up to the minute though!

 

 

I work during the typical hours for such a thing, but the primetime Olympic spectacle is what it's all about anyway. Yesterday, I caught syncronized diving and, not only are these guys in better shape than you, they can also dive more gracefully (or "pretty" as the female analyst relentlessly put it) from panic-inducing heights. People talk about the Olympics being boring, but, as someone who only watches sports occasionally (I know a ton of sports fans, so I'm covered in the fandom, though I don't really get that into it myself) I disagree. I'm not the most patriotic guy on the 'nets, but I find myself rooting for the US athletes even during events I'd not normally give two shits about, including sync diving!

 

 

Or freakin beach volleyball.

 

 

China won the gold for diving, but yesterday put America in the top overall for medals.

COUNTRY				TOTAL
United States	7	6	8	21
China	11	3	4	18
South Korea	5	5	1	11
Italy	3	4	2	9
Australia	3	1	5	9

[via NYT]

 

The Dudes in Speedos 2008 games chugs onward, with Michael Phelps winning another gold, further on his way to breaking that old record or at least matching it, which would grant him $1mil from my favorite mankini shiller and yours, Speedo (they do so much and never ask anything in returnm, except that dudes wear Speedos, I guess).

 

My intention is to catch gymnastics one of these days. It's funny, these people are in the best shape(s?) of anyone in the world, yet many of them come across like tremendous dorks, and that is a good thing. All the badass high school jocks are either in sports professionally, or are bankers or something.

 

PS: I recently read Bill Maher (whom I like) say that he doesn't watch the Olympics because they're kinda gay, although I don't know what he's talking about.

                             

Everything clear over here!

Last pic via Jezebel.

 

 

Since I don't watch a lot of TV, but have the Olympic bug this year, it's been kind of tough going as far as actually being able to watch them. I spent a good deal of my time in front of a computer, and so the fact that the Olympics can largely be viewed online would seem like a good thing. Except that it's not, because I, like a lot of people, want to watch the swimming events, among others, but NBC is to good to let me watch that shit online, so I have to watch it on the telly, except my TV gets shit reception of NBC. So I'm forced to read about it and look at pictures, like the poor person I am. (I tried a youtube hack [or did I? i didn't] that bypass Universal's rules so that I could watch the games there, but they figured that shit out and cut me off [sad face]).

Anyway, here are the top five countries at this point, courtesy of NBC, who should just let me watch the Olympics online, 'cause it's not like the online videos don't also have commercials (who watches TV anymore anyway, jesus!) [NBC] (picture via NYT).

	COUNTRY	MEDALISTS	GOLD	SILVER	BRONZE	TOTAL
	China	see names	8	3	2	13
	United States	see names	3	4	5	12
	South Korea	see names	4	2	0	6
	Italy	see names	2	3	1	6
	Russia	see names	0	4	2	6

 

Deadspin writes a lot about this stuff too, better than I ever will. Actually watching the events in real-time probably helps, but I'm at work, and thus am not required to think too much about that.

 

 

China sure is on a roll, seemingly ready to put its Darfur-genocide-apologizing/communist-empathizing days behind it, at least for the next several days or so. For some reason, I'm into the olympics. I think it is largely due to my recent vow to be athletic in some way (after years of being the Kate Moss of boys), drawing me toward people who exemplify the idea. Anyhoo, the hours are effing crazy because of time zones and shit, but the New York Times, my friend and yours, has a handy-dandular interactive schedule to appease your olympic god/goddess fetishizing needs. Go for the gold here: 2008 Beijing Olympic Event Scheduele [NYT; pictures from there and Zimbio]

 

 

 

 

I work out and crap, and, I, like, I assume, most people who do the same, hold myself to a physical template, and this concept will be discussed in this area, on this post, later. I can't figure out how to get my computer at work to accept the level of granduer I expect from my posts, so I have to think of this shit while I'm here, and wait 'til I get home to actually flesh it out, oh, poordom!

 

 

I'M BACK: Anyway...So where was I? Right. America's blog, Gawker, calls attention to a study that concludes that pictures of skinny, pretty models advertising a product, makes women feel worse about themselves and, inversely, makes them think the product is representative of some sort of ideal that is better than them, making them want to buy it. I see this happen with dudes as well--they walk by Abercrombie and see the ripped guy posing some jeans, call him a homo, then go buy the fucking jeans, as if Levis doesn't sell just as good of quality. Now, the thing about models, whether male or female, is, if being a model is their primary source of income, then they have all the time in the world to work out if they want to. They don't have to spend all day in the office, or the daycare center, or Applebees, then hit the YMCA on the way home. All they have to worry about is looking good, so holding yourself to look like them can be dangerous, because you are not them.

 

 

BUT, I kind of feeling like a dude trying to get ripped like a model can be done in a good way, and the person can become overall more healthy because of it. Of course, anything can be abused, including your body, in the name of obsessing over how you look in the first place. But if girls are trying to look like Kate Moss, and they want to get that way within a year, there really can't be a healthy way to acheive this. She's fuckin' super skinny and (allegedly) does drugs, so even if you're dieting, it's probably a shit diet. If you're working out, it's probably too much. I mean, she's good looking, but why would you want to look like her?

 

 

What I mean is, besides the implication of being in perfect light and having a world renowned photographer play up your best features, maybe we can consider the dozens of different body types that come off as attractive, instead of whatever one type we all, respectively, have fixed in our minds as the bees fucking knees. So here's a bunch of pictures of people's bodies, and you can decide which ones are healthily attainable (and worth going for, if only to be healthy, if you need a reason not to feel supeficial about it). Mixed up, boys and girls (click on pictures for larger).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

link to gawker

link to Adage covering the study

model portfo pics from COACD

The levels to which i am looking forward to the Dark Knight are sort of embarrassing. I don't think it's going to be the Best Movie Ever, or even the Best PG-13 Blockbuster Released in the Month of July Ever, but I've been looking forward to it since the joker card at the end of Batman Begins. I've been looking forward to it further ever since Heath Ledger was cast as the Joker. He has almost made me cry with his acting, so that makes him good (Brothers Grimm gets me every time jkjkjkjk).

Christian Bale was good in the Machinist (American Psycho was ok, the book was better) Morgan Freeman is boss hog, and Maggie G is good as well (I don't know shit about Eckhart, not from experience at least). Superhero sequels have a tendency to be pretty good, so i'm hoping.